Friday, June 10, 2011

The Weight of the World

I cannot fully explain the day I've had. It's been surreal to say the least. Everything in my life is remarkable. I have no reason for worry UNTIL I foster the weight of the world on my shoulders. Am I so naive as to think that I, as an individual, can make a difference in the world?

I try so hard to be a good person. To be a sincere human being and  to be worthy of God's love. I'm sure there are those folks that would like to poke my eyes out at times because, for the most part, I'm upbeat and cheerful. Laughter has been my defense mechanism since childhood. Today, I fell short. I was mentally and physically drained and when that happens, I'm grouchy. I was ill for no apparent reason and I just don't like being that way. I take my frustration out on those I love. It makes me wonder how folks can go their whole lives without truly being happy. I don't mean happy as in financially, either. Lots of folks tend to have the idea that if they have money, along comes happiness. I beg to differ. I've had money and the only thing I had, were material possessions. Granted, money helps out for the things that we need; that's a huge difference than the things that we want.

I've had this indifferent feeling since Wednesday night and I'm full. It's time for this feeling to go away. I tried to go to bed early this evening, but no, I couldn't sleep. So, as I finish up my rambling, I turn to my Bible, which is what I do consistently these days and find this scripture, to help me through this indifferent feeling:

Romans 12:2 -
And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.

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