Four Glorious Years

Four years ago today, I detached myself from a habit I thought I was unable to live without. I was a complete mess and so was my life. I'm not saying it was easy. In the beginning, it certainly wasn't easy at all;  but I'm proof that you can. 

I am openly honest about my former drug addiction and I have no desire to be otherwise. If you're interested in judging, that's you and Your Walk. I am completely comfortable with who I am, who I was and who I strive to be. I always say this because it's true: 

If I'd not been there, I wouldn't be here. That's my motto, I guess you'd say.

Honesty is an important step for my recovery. I'm not exactly sure how the 12 steps work, but my steps have been honesty and support from those I love. Unfortunately, along my way there have been looks of disbelief and judgement; which I'm sure happens to everyone to who makes a change in their lives. For some reason, people tend to judge that that they do not understand or are unwilling to remove from their lives.

I wish I could wrap my arms around every one that experiences this pain in their life and tell them, it gets better. It gets easier. It gets glorious! 

I want so badly to be a recovery advocate. I want to shout my story from the rooftops and help those that need it. Sadly, I know from my own recovery, you have to have the "want to" before anything changes. I struggled with drug and alcohol addiction in some form or another from 15 years old. I am now 32 years old and completely drug and alcohol free! So, when i say life is glorious, that's an understatement. 

If you read this and have any suggestions on how I may go about being a recovery advocate, please feel free to comment here. Also, feel free to share this publicly or privately to anyone you feel may need to hear this! SUPPORT IS KEY!

His Grace

As I sip my freshly brewed cup of Maxwell House (that I bought on sale) and listen to Liberate Me by Rachel Sauls, I know that I am Blessed. I am Blessed to be given one more day on this beautiful Earth and one more day to spend with the two loves of my life.

This day has been electrifying (to say the least). Words cannot express what I feel. Exactly where I am is exactly where I want to be.

I spent this glorious day with treasured family. We celebrated our dear son's third birthday. The celebration of his birthday has been an emotional experience for me. I'm trying to keep this is mind:

Don't be afraid of change because it is always necessary for progress. --- Joyce Meyer

Although I usually (usually, not always) embrace change with open arms, it is quite difficult for me to embrace that my baby is growing up. As I stop to reflect on the years that Owen has been in our life to mold us into the parents we are, I am pleased. He is proof of who we were are as people, as individuals.

I know I will be that Mommy; you know, the one outside the pre-k door holding her box of Kleenex, fogging up the window with tears, when it's time for Owen to start school. One thing I know:

I can do all things through Christ which strengtheneth me --- Philippians 4:13